We Do a Headcount

When women in this industry walk into a room, we do a headcount.

How many other women are in the room? What’s the ratio?

I do it automatically now. I don’t even think about it. I just scan the room and count. Three women, fifteen men. One woman, twelve men. Just me.

The Numbers

In 2000, less than 5% of energy startups had at least one female founder. By 2021, that number had climbed to slightly over 10%. Progress, I guess. But for comparison, other industries went from 15% to 20% over the same period. Energy is still way behind.

The women I’ve met in climate work know this. They feel it every day.

The Only One in the State

What surprised me when I started interviewing people for my book: women asked to remain anonymous far more often than men. Two reasons. First, they were worried about professional repercussions for speaking publicly about their work. Second, for many of them, just knowing their industry and geography would make them identifiable because they were the only woman in their field in their entire state.

The only woman in the entire state.

That’s not a figure of speech. I talked to women who were literally the only person of their gender doing their job in their geographic region. Everybody knew who they were. They couldn’t speak freely without being identified.

The Fierce Ones

The business owners were different. They were fierce. Every single one of them talked about being a woman in a male-dominated industry. They weren’t hiding from it. They were proud of what they’d built, and they wanted to talk about the obstacles they’d faced.

These women had earned the right to speak because they owned the company. Nobody could fire them for saying the wrong thing. That freedom was hard-won.

Female founders are less likely to receive funding than male founders with the same credentials. That’s documented. It’s not speculation. The data is clear. Women have to be better to get the same opportunities, and even then, the money flows more easily to men.

The Weight of Representing

Imposter syndrome hits harder when you’re the only one who looks like you in the room. When every meeting is a headcount. When you can’t just relax and focus on the work because you’re also representing your entire gender, whether you want to or not.

I’ve felt this. The sense that any mistake I make reflects on all women in the field. The pressure to be perfect because being average isn’t good enough when you’re being watched more closely. The exhaustion of being a symbol when you just want to be a person doing a job.

The women I interviewed for my book were especially happy to see me because I’m a woman too. There’s a solidarity in it. A shared understanding of what it takes to survive and succeed in this industry.

The Truth

Things are getting better. Slowly. The numbers are improving, decade by decade. But we’re still at the point where women are a visible minority in most climate and energy settings. Still at the point where the headcount happens automatically.

If you’re a woman considering a career in climate, I’m not going to give you a pep talk. Here’s the truth.

Yes, it’s real. The sexism exists. The funding gap exists. The isolation of being the only woman in the room exists. You will be underestimated. You will have to prove yourself twice. You will sit in meetings where men talk over you, and then repeat your idea back to the room five minutes later like they thought of it.

I’m Not Leaving

I’m tired of it. I’m tired of being grateful for incremental progress. I’m tired of celebrating that we went from 5% to 10% in twenty years like that’s some kind of victory. I’m tired of the headcount.

But I’m here. And I’m not leaving.

The women in this industry are some of the toughest, smartest, most stubborn people I’ve ever met. We have to be. That should make us angry, not proud. We shouldn’t have to be twice as tough to get half as far.

So if you want to join us, come. We need you. Not because more women will make the men behave better. Not because diversity is good for business or whatever HR says. We need you because this work matters, and it’s absurd that we’re trying to solve the biggest problem humanity has ever faced while leaving half the talent on the sidelines.

Come do the headcount with us. Come be angry about the numbers. Come help us change them anyway.

I’m tired of this fight. But I’m not done with it.